How to Love Your Wife Sacrificially

See to it . . . that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled.

–Hebrews 12:15

Every member of the household has a responsibility, and Paul said the husband’s responsibility is to love his wife sacrificially. If you’re a husband, how do you love your wife sacrificially? Let me give you three practical suggestions.

1. Do something unexpected for your wife. If she’s the one who usually cooks dinner, offer to be responsible for dinner one night this week. Or surprise her by hiring a maid service to come and do a few cleaning tasks that nobody wants to do. Or if she has family out of town that she hasn’t seen for a while, make arrangements so she can visit her family. Do something unexpected and kind for your mate.
2. Prioritize meeting your wife’s physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. Women and men have different needs; it’s important to understand those differences so you can fulfill your mate’s needs. For example, after work, you may want to sit in your chair, grunting and watching television, while your wife has a need for conversation. To meet your wife’s needs, you have to be aware of how her physical, emotional, and spiritual needs differ from yours.

In a previous church I pastored, there was a family of five that began attending our church. The wife loved it there, and the children were plugged into our children’s ministry. But the husband wanted a church with a more contemporary worship style. So he decided their family would keep church hopping, week after week. The wife needed stability, but the husband placed his interests above hers. Sacrificially loving your wife means putting her interests above your own.

3. Learn to forgive your mate instantly. In Colossians 3:19, Paul said, “Do not be embittered against [your wives].” When you live with somebody, eventually they’re going to do something to hurt you. The offense may be as traumatic as an extramarital affair or as trivial as a forgotten birthday. No matter how large or how small the offense, you can choose how to respond: you can hold on to that offense until it grows into a weed of bitterness that chokes out the love in your relationship, or you can forgive. Ephesians 4:32 says, “Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” When offenses come into your marriage, it is crucial that you model forgiveness for your family by letting go of those offenses rather than holding on to them.

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Today’s devotion is adapted from “Dads, Front and Center” by Dr. Robert Jeffress, 2012.

Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. www.lockman.org.